It's Christmas! My favorite time of the year.
In keeping with the tradition of many, I had the privilege of going to a Christmas Eve service last night at my church. It was beautiful. I was honored to be a reader, getting to tell the Christmas Story, the true Christmas Story. We sang. We lit candles. We took a few moments to quiet our hearts before the One who gave up everything to become one of us. We celebrated communion.
It was beautiful.
It was also...messy.
One speaker (myself) stumbled so poorly over one of her lines she had to stop, pause, gather her thoughts, and start the sentence over.
During one of the more difficult congregational songs "Star of Wonder," the praise team didn't quite match itself or the congregation...that silly refrain, "OhhOhh" into "Star of Wonder, star of light" was a doozie for us last night.
One musician began playing a special number as the pastor was getting up to preach the sermon. He tried calling out to her, but she was unable to hear as the monitor was blasting into her face. She played beautiful music, but it stopped mid-measure, and she sat down awkwardly.
One pastor actually lost his grip on the communion tray and some of the crackers, (the body of Jesus!) fell to the ground.
One child was slightly burned with the wax from the candles we lit at the end of the service.
(At least) one family struggled as the mother tried to quietly (so as not to disturb others) explain to her children what was going on; i.e. the communion - should they take it? The candles, could they with their fidgety hands hold it? The songs, the sermon, etc. I'm sure most parents have been there; that frustrating and embarrassing, "my children aren't behaving" fear, when really...how could they know if this is their first "sacred" service? And, even if they do know better, and are willfully misbehaving, there is something so precious, so beautiful, so profound to me in the invitation - Jesus wouldn't turn them away or look over at the mother condescendingly. He would say, "Welcome the little children unto me." Not just the well-behaved ones, I am sure. They are welcome. They are wanted. They...don't have to have it all together to come.
And, (praise Jesus!) neither do we.
As I pause to reflect on this service, with all its planned schedule and intentional focus...and all of its "messiness"...my heart resonates with the true, profound, significant ways our service last night reflects the beauty of the story we celebrate today.
Sure, it's complicated. But, that is part of what makes it so stunning.
Jesus, after all, came in the least likely way possible. It's one of the things that, for me, makes the story so profound. If it was made up, would someone really write the narrative that way? Teenage girl gets "knocked up" by God, and then her fiance has a dream so he changes his mind and decides not to divorce her. They are forced to travel quite a long distance away for a census, only to find there is "no room" for them, so they give birth to the Son of God in a dirty, lonely stable. The animals are the only "witnesses" to the birth of this Jesus. The angels visit shepherds of course, to sing of the glorious news; but shepherds were the least likely news-anchors of the day. As far as we know the powerful of the day didn't get a warning, the wealthy didn't get an announcement, the prominent slept through the whole ordeal. If you were writing a story, is that how you would tell the greatest one ever told?
Jesus. Yeshua. The LORD saves.
Immanuel. God is with us! Our God...is here!
The Christ. The ONE on whom God's favor rests, who will deliver us, has come to set his children free.
He came!
And we could have missed it.
And then I think of the people He spent his life with. At least, his last three, significant, ministry-focused years. He draws fishermen into his inner circle, and eats with anyone (and I mean anybody), sharing meals with the shame-filled of society. He questions the religious status-quo, and calls his people to a new understanding of the intentions of God on earth. The powerful, prestigious, and prominent feel slighted. And that, among other things, is one significant reason Jesus got himself killed.
His life was a clear witness that "having it all together" is not the way into heaven (silly Pharisees). Having the right answers and being the religious elite was not the way to please God (sorry, Scribes). Being born of the right lineage didn't seem to matter to Jesus either (Oops! Jews, it looks like Gentiles and Samaritans and other "lesser" people will actually have a place at his table also!) Apparently, cultural privilege and honor was not anything particularly in your favor, for the common man, the outcast and "sinner," are the ones on whom Jesus' compassion was placed.
Jesus lived a messy life! At least, it seems that to me. He touched lepers! He ate with poor people (who probably had worse hygiene than we in the 21st century can imagine!) He had friends who were prostitutes. A single, not-married man giving space to "loose" women, but not utilizing their..."resumes" the way anyone else would. He, Himself, was homeless and single - two stigmas which follow us today into shame and feeling as though we don't belong. Culturally speaking, Jesus didn't "have it all together" either.
Jesus didn't have it all together, in any way we would think a Messiah should.
And that...gives me hope.
But, then, after I've considered the quiet way he came and the "messy" way he lived out this God-With-Us perfect life, I think about His people through the ages. Have we ever done things "right?"
We've tried. But...
"Christianity," or at the very least Christians who claimed to be Christ's followers, can be charged with astronomical failings. Consider the crusades. Slavery. Child rape at the hands priests, pastors, and parents. Hitler and the Nazi regime claimed Jesus and Christianity as the..."foundation." Think of our social-economic disparity in this country; some of the most conservative "Christians" stand for an even larger economic disparity between wealth and poverty, when Jesus himself said "Give to all who ask; and do not turn away someone in need." (Paraphrased, Matt 5:42).
These are disgusting misrepresentations of Christ's heart. Have we ever gotten it right?
I'm going to say: Nope. I don't think we have. And, I know, these things listed have grieved God's heart. They are abominable. They are not Kingdom of God perspectives made incarnate in love as Jesus wanted.
And yet...
Let me take just a brief moment to clarify: eggregious sin that harms people is NOT of God, in any way shape or form. But, God's people have done some of the worst, and in His name none-the-less. We, as a group, need to be forgiven. We also need to find ourselves NOT casting stones, for we have done the work of recognizing we are certainly NOT without sin of our own. We cannot sit on seats of judgment, or criticize or condemn folks whose ideology doesn't match our own, for we haven't honored the heartbeat of Jesus, either.
Please forgive me, this isn't meant to be a "rage against the machine" sermon, or my own political-ideology platform. Please forgive me for stepping on toes. Please forgive me for making us...uncomfortable. But, when we look at Christianity through the ages, when we consider the imperfect way we have loved, forgiven, served...can we really say we've honored Christ's commandments to us?
No. We have not.
It's messy, folks.
And, all I'm saying is...somehow I think there is still hope.
Jesus could have come differently; he chose a manger in a stable. Jesus could have lived differently; he chose to partner with the questionable. Jesus, the very Son of God, apparently is OK with works-in-process, trying-to-figure-it-out, #shortsighted people who don't have it all together...as long as we are true seekers.
Like the Magi. Humbly we come.
Jesus is NOT OK with His name being used to abuse, but He IS OK with people who don't have it all together seeking Him.
Scripture tells us stories that infer Jesus never turned away an honest, humble seeker. He's not OK with damage done, but He is OK with...questions, doubt, insecurities, missed-cues, and dropped communion wafers.
We've "dropped" it before; He still loves. We've missed our cues; He still forgives. We've turned right when He was leading left; He still says "Come, follow me."
Messy isn't rejected in the Kingdom of God. And this morning, I am so thankful for that.
